We’re delighted to share this guest post with you by the wonderful Sally Bruce, a local Perth celebrant we can’t recommend highly enough. Sally is great at crafting intimate, authentic wedding ceremonies that are rich in all the things that matter to the couple. And she’s got a passion for empowering couples to have a celebration that’s mindful and aligned with their values. Sally’s business is underpinned by the permaculture ethics of Earth Care, People Care, Fair Share – and we love that!
Advice from a marriage celebrant: Top tips for couples planning a wedding by Sally Bruce Celebrant
1. Focus on the marriage, not the wedding
Remember that your marriage is for the rest of your lives; your wedding is just one day. Make sure you’re putting time and energy into what really matters – each other. I know from working with my couples that planning a wedding can be easy and fun – please don’t let it stress you out so much that you get sick or are so tired you can’t enjoy the day.
Tip – set a realistic wedding budget and stick to it – don’t start your marriage in debt from your wedding.
2. Choose the right vendors
Planning a wedding gives you enormous consumer power to make choices that support the things that are important you as a couple.
Book vendors who will
- align with your values as well as your vision
- make your wedding 100% about you and your relationship, not a cookie-cutter version of every other wedding
- stay calm and guide you through the process
- make the process easy and enjoyable.
Tip – find one vendor you like, and ask them for recommendations. We’re industry professionals and know lots of people who work in weddings. Once we understand your vibe we’ll be happy to recommend other vendors who we think will be a good fit. Bonus – they’ll also be people we enjoy working with, which will bring great energy to your big day!
3. Write your own vows
Did you know that you can add your own wording to the legal vows you need to say during the ceremony? Words are powerful, so speak your own intentions and promises aloud as you breathe your marriage into life. Trust me – this is the best way I’ve found to truly personalise your wedding.
Tip – even if you think you’re not a writer – you can do this! I’ve helped many people craft beautiful, meaningful, moving and funny personalised vows – and your celebrant will be happy to help you do this too.
4. Make your own traditions
Are you including a lot of ‘shoulds’ in your plans? Things that other people expect, or that you’ve seen at other weddings, but that don’t really mean anything to you? I encourage my couples to throw away any wedding traditions that don’t reflect who they are as a couple. Make your wedding truly yours by only including things that light you up. If you’re thinking about including something in your wedding simply because ‘it’s tradition’ or ‘because everyone else does’, I strongly recommend you don’t do it!
Tip – use the phrase “we’re making our own traditions” to answer anyone who tries to make you include an outdated wedding tradition that’s not for you!
5. Have fun and enjoy the process
We’ve all grown up with movies that play on outdated tropes like ‘bridezillas’, but in my experience this isn’t the norm. Wedding planning can be an easy and fun process you can enjoy together.
Tip – if it’s all feeling too much:
- check that you’re sharing the mental load of wedding planning between the two of you
- make sure you’re only including people and things that you both really want to be part of the day
- and talk to your vendors about how you’re feeling – we’ll see what we can do to make it easier.
Check out Sally’s website and follow her Instagram.
Photo of Sally by Red Eclectic taken at our annual Twilight Wedding Market, held every spring.
Need more vendor recommendations? Head to our Event Experts post.